Thursday, April 30, 2009

So What Are People From South East Idaho Going to Drive Now?

Earlier this week, GM announced that they were discontinuing production of their Pontiac line. It really is a shame.

Who didn't want to spin out on a dirt road in a black Trans Am with a golden eagle painted on the hood after seeing Smokey and the Bandit? You gotta love the classic GTO, the Firebird even the newer Solstice was a good looking car. And now it's all gone. Does this mean the end of the T Top as well? I'm pretty sure that was a Pontiac exclusive. Man, Bon Jovi never sounded better than when blaring out of a Pontiac T Top in your local Burger King parking lot.

I want highlight a cultural anomaly that is local to the Mountain West. I don't know why it is, but there seems to be a disproportionately large amount of Pontiacs being purchased in South East Idaho. I live in Salt Lake, which is pretty close to our north of the border friends in Pocatello, Idaho Falls, Blackfoot and Rexburg. Now I could be mistaken. But it seems that nearly every car I see driving around Utah with the Red, White and Blue Idaho plate with 8B in the corner is a Pontiac. It's usually a Grand Am and often maroon. Now, I'm not drawing any conclusions here. My sarcastic Bon Jovi comment aside, I really do think Pontiacs are damn fine cars. Just check out that beauty at the top of the page. Not a damn thing wrong with that baby. Perhaps there is just one hell of a car salesman working at a Pontiac dealership in Rigby. I imagine that his name is Chet. Or maybe LaDale. And he has an immaculately well groomed mustache.

This raises the question of what will be the new car of choice of Bonneville County now? My guess is the Plymouth. What? They don't make those anymore, either? Hell. Then I don't know. I say, Mercedes for all! I want to make it clear that I'm trying to be snooty. It's just a peculiar aberration is all. Or maybe it's all in my head. Idahoans, feel free to confirm or deny.

There's one more point I'd like to make on the death of Pontiac. Why the hell didn't GM kill the Mercury* line instead? In my lifetime, I have known thousands of people. As I sit and think, of those thousands of people I cannot think of one of them that drove a Mercury. I can think of people that drove Buicks (Grandma Welch swore by them), Oldsmobiles, Daewoos, Plymouths, Suzukees, Internationals, Saturns, Daihatsu and Fiats. I once knew a guy that drove an AMC Eagle. It was badass. But I cannot for the life of me think of one person that I have ever had any personal contact with that drove a Mercury while I was associated with them.

And yet Pontiac gets the ax. Life ain't fair.

*The obvious answer to this stupid question is that Mercury is a Ford brand, not GM. Ten seconds on Google can teach you a thing or two. It just illustrates how big of a gear head I am which of course only adds to my credibility on this subject.


Gregg said...

First of all, ASS, 8B is Idaho Falls, Second, Rigby is not in Bonneville county, third, never EVER associate Pocatello with Idaho Falls ever again. If you do, Wayne Brady is going to have to choke a bitch.

I still love you.

Earth Sign Mama said...

Grandpa Welch was a Mercury man for many years. Then he switched to Olds 88. When Grandma became a Buick girl, I was amazed. It almost as amazing as when she started buying Cheerios and not just Kellogg's cereals.

BusterBluth52 said...

Oh Gregg, Pokey is a lovely town. As far as I know. I guess it's like confusing Sugarhouse for Magna.

But am I fair in suggesting that there are a lot of Pontiacs driven in the that part of the state?

Gregg said...

TO be honest, I have never noticed, but I will start paying attention.

Informant said...

Gary Snow had a Mercury for years.

Scoosba said...

Interesting point. My dad who lives in Idaho Falls drove a maroon Grand Am for years. He is now a Honda man.